Questioner
Yes or no: will the Stick ever come back?
Brandon Sanderson
The Stick? The Stick is omnipresent in all books, but I think the Stick has had so much screentime already that it would be distracting from other characters.
Found 42 entries in 0.132 seconds.
Yes or no: will the Stick ever come back?
The Stick? The Stick is omnipresent in all books, but I think the Stick has had so much screentime already that it would be distracting from other characters.
Yesterday you said that crem was actually like Shard poop.
No, I was saying that it was more like that than what they were saying.
It's not really poop?
No, its not.
Dang it, I like poop jokes! Can you make it poop so i can have a poop joke.
Ok, for the next thirty seconds it is.
If you could cross over Mat Cauthon into any other story which one would you do?
Let's say Twilight. Yeah, Mat plus Twilight would be lots of fun.
I heard that in one of your books two people from the actual 17th Shard got married as members of the 17th Shard in your book.
Yes, shes right there. That's Mi'chelle, she's a beta reader. She and her husband met at a signing at a Barnes & Noble of mine. So they met at one of my signings, and they eventually got engaged at my class in BYU so I put their wedding in a book.
My friend has a theory: The Lord Ruler is the one that Shattered the Shattered Plains. Is that a possibility?
I won't discount it out of hand. Mostly just so that he can keep arguing with you guys.
Are there any Cognitive Shades of Mistborn Llamas?
Hehe-- In the Alcatraz universe, there sure are. 'Cause, I mean, in the Alcatraz universe it is canon, for instance, that Asmodean existed, and it's canon that Spook existed and high imperial exists. So in the Alcatraz universe all bets are off.
Where do you lie on the "BrandoSando" versus "Branderson"?
I would probably go "Branderson", but I don't mind either of them.
Because I'm firmly in the BrandoSando camp.
BrandoSando? What about "BrandySandy"? I get that one too... No one goes with the cool ones. "Oh, the Sandman". I'm not cool enough.
Toilet paper. Does the extra go over or under?
I am actually agnostic on this one... ambivalent. I don't even notice.
Is Adolin a French fries or onion ring kind of guy?
Boy! Onion rings, I think, probably, maybe. I don't know. It's a hard question, very hard. Lift is "Yes, please!".
If you had to make any of your books into a musical?
Ooh. Well, since we already have a canonical version of The Hero of Ages as a musical in the Mistborn world, in one of the broadsheets, we would have to go with that, we would have to do the version in-world.
I think Warbreaker would translate the best.
Yeah, that's probably true. If you want a real answer, that's probably true. It's probably the best.
If could be an Epic, what would your Epic name be and what would your powers be?
Um, I'm not sure. Let's see... Epic name... Mr. Prolific. Right? That'd be a good name. *pause to sign and gets distracted*
What was your question? What was the answer to the High Epic? The question she asked?
Oh, oh, I was gonna-- My name was Mr. Prolific.
Mister what?
Mr. Prolific.
Mr. Prolific? *laughs*
What was your power?
If I could choose I'd be able to fly. But I don't think you get to choose. So it's probably the ability to make books materialize out of thin air. *group laughs* And then use them as weapons.
I thought that three years ago you wanted to write a book with Tad Williams and have George R.R. Martin finish it. Is that still just a pipe dream?
That's still a pipe dream
So the question is; I had this goofy idea one time, and I thought "what if I get this other famous fantasy writer and together the two of us wrote"... and we would write a book together, but it wouldn't be a Brandon Sanderson and, it would be a Brandon Sanderson versus where we each create a set of characters who have contrasting role, were against each other, and who would try to achieve this, um, they would both be on opposite sides and they would seduce each other's characters or murder each other's characters and thing like this and we would write it almost to the climax, and then we would go to George Martin and we would say "you have to adjudicate how we would write the ending" and so the cover would be like 'Brandon Sanderson vs. Pat Rothfuss with guest judge George R.R. Martin".
It is really just a pipe dream, especially when its a matter of 'when are we gonna do that', and it's really just a pipe dream. Maybe i'll make it happen, the trick is I'd have to find... like I cant do Pat because his fans would kill me for slowing him down. So it would have to be someone like Brent or Anya. Somebody who is a little faster, but I could totally see a 'Brandon Sanderson vs. Brent Weeks' right, you guys don't have to root for him cause he lives here. Yeah, something like that. We'll see if I can make it happen.
What is your favorite word in the English language?
[...] Rutabaga.
Is there a reason?
Because it made me laugh when I used it in the Alcatraz books, and it became a theme of those books, which do silly things for no good reason.
Why do you have salt?
Because this is my tour box, and I like to salt my food. And sometimes I will be on tour and have to grab food real fast after a signing or before, and so I have salt to salt my food.
Riddle me this: Why did the Horneater couple stop after four kids?
*Playing along*
Alright, go for it.
They didn't want to get heir-sick.
*Laughs/groans*
A Rioter, a Soother, and a Coinshot all go to buy a car.
The Soother goes up to the salesman and is like "hey can I buy a car" and the salesman goes "No, every time I sell to you people I always end up wanting to please you too much: I don't want to sell you the car, get out of here."
The Rioter walks up. He's like "hey, can I buy a car?" and the salesman goes "No, every time I try to sell to you folks I always end up wanting to try and *garbled* too much, get out of here."
The Coinshot walks up and the salesman goes "No you gotta *garbled* too, get out here." The Coinshot's like "what!? I can't mess with your emotions." The salesman goes "well yeah, but you guys are way too pushy."
Wow.
What's your opinion on selfie sticks?
Opinion on selfie sticks? I think they look kind of dumb.
You have to congratulate whoever did the Soonie pup ad. Effective advertising: I want one!
Yes, lots of people have said this. It was not something we were intending to do. It would have to be more than just a little puppy, though. You'd have to be able to rip out its spikes and transform it or something. You can go get a stuffed puppy anywhere.
But it's a stuffed TenSoon, so it's a stuffed Irish wolfhound. And you can find those in adult. You cannot find those in puppy.
That's true. I'll think about it.
You don't have to do the spikes.
I know, but people will want the spikes. They are gonna be like "If you're gonna provide me with a Soonie pup"-- You'd have to be able to take out the spikes and turn it into a blob, so it's a mistwraith on the inside and a Soonie pup on the outside.
It'd have to be something like a backpack dog. Maybe the spikes are clasps on the outside or something.
Yeah.
Matrim Cauthon, Kelsier, and Vasher all decide they need to get together and run a heist on Hoid. How do they do it? Why? And what are they looking for? Assuming they know where his "hideout" is...
Mat has to be persuaded. He doesn't think this is worth it. Once he knows about Fortune, he'd be interested.
Kelsier wants to beat him to a pulp.
Vasher is very utilitarian about it, and agrees that having access to him would be smart, but dangerous.
Do you have a list of the adjectives you use for Peter in the acknowledgments?
I do have a list, so I don’t repeat myself.
Couldn't think of any [questions], but I would just like to say that I would like to punch Kelsier in the face now, so... *group laughs*
He usually deserves getting punched in the face. *group laughs* If you were to meet Kelsier on the street, you can guess he has something that he's done that makes him deserve to be punched that day. *group laughs*
There should be an art of the cosmere coloring book.
We plan to do one some day.
Will we be seeing any more of stick?
Everybody loves stick, everybody is very fond of stick. I have no current plans for stick.
Spook?
You will find out more about Spook.
It is not impossible that you will see some sort of story involving Spook. After all I did a little short story about Kelsier for the role playing game. It's now on my website.
If Waxillium will become a Vessel, would the godmetal created by him, be... the waxillium?
He laughed and said it will be right in that way.
Kelsier, does he like noodles?
Yes.
What would happen if the King’s Wit, Wayne, and Mat Cauthon from these last three Wheel of Time books went into a room and locked it?
I think they’d all like each other. And they'd try to one-up each other, it’d be an epic thing.
Now, I will say there is one thing I've been wanting to do for a long time that will probably never happen so don't get too excited. But I had this awesome idea once, and these come to me, where I would write a book with Pat Rothfuss where *audience gets too excited*-- wait, wait, you've gotta hear this pitch - where we both have a set of characters who're competing for misaligned goals, like one wants to save somebody and one wants to assassinate somebody-- they've cross purposes. And we write them, and exchange chapters, and have try to assassinate each other and fiddle with each other's plots. And we get it to, like, 80% of the way done and then we send it to George Martin, and we say "read this and decide the ending and then we'll write it *audience laughter and applause*. And so the reason I want to this is so we can write on the cover, it's not "Brandon Sanderson and Pat Rothfuss", it's "Brandon Sanderson vs. Pat Rothfuss". And see who wins at the end if we can convince George not to kill all of our characters. It's never going to happen, but wouldn't that be fun?
Would you rather fight 100 duck-sized Lopens or 1 Lopen-sized duck?
One Lopen sized duck, assuming it's not a Surgebinder.
What's Hoid's favorite flavor of pie?
He likes to be surprised!
Do you think Roshar will invent waffle technology?
Waffle technology, I think they will... definitely. There may be a little work left to go.
Will it be in Lift's time?
*laughs* Yes, probably Lift's time. Yes, she would enjoy some waffles.
Would Hoid, Amaram, and Rashek be flute buddies or would they try to kill each other?
*Sigh, long pause* I'm going to err on, "Kill each other."
I was wondering what your thoughts on cosmemes are.
Cosmemes? I think they're hilarious and we can only aspire to the greatness that is trebuchet memes or prequel memes. Someday, perhaps, we, too, will be great.
If the gang from Writing Excuses were put in a horror film, obviously Dan would be the killer. But what order do you think everyone would die in? And how would they die? (The victim list includes: you, Howard, Jordan, Pemberly, Stacy, and Peter.)
Ha! Well, let's see. If Dan were the killer, I think he'd try to take out Howard first, since Howard is obviously the most dangerous of us all. Though he sees me more often, so he might try to get to me first. I'd put it in this order:
HowardMeJordoPeterPemberly (he'd leave the women for last because he's a very gentlemanly killer.)
And then Stacy would take Dan down in a surprise ending. She'd edit him out of the script or something.
Brandon's favorite flavor of gelato is lemon.
What are we going to do when you retire?
Retire? RETIRE?! I would never! I will stop writing when they find me dead in my office and my face is on the keyboard and I type the word "k" seven thousand times.
So I wanted to ask how Count Dooku was?
Count Dooku has passed on to the Beyond for plants. I know, I know. Count Dooku-- The funny thing is, this isn't even a picture of Count Dooku. The joke with Count Dooku was Count Dooku was actually not a potted plant-- he was a plant that lived in a glass sphere, with just the roots into the water. Now that was a joke when, you know, Alcatraz put the joke about the potted plant in there--was given to me by a friend of mine. But Count Dooku has since moved on to the great Beyond for plants. So we had to use a different picture. We didn't have an actual picture.
I was wondering if you have off the top of your head any one-armed Herdazian jokes to offer?
Only the obvious one.
That being?
How do you get the one-armed Herdazian out of a tree?
How's that?
You wave!
Could the entire city of Newcago in the Reckoner's world act as a giant steel metalmind?
Sure! Yes. That'd be awesome.
Is Lopen still going to have one-armed jokes?
Oh, he will always have one-armed jokes! He's probably going to have to come up with some two-armed jokes.
What do you call it when a Faceless Immortal says two things that can't both be true?
Uhh... I dunno. What?
A kandra-diction.
*grinning* Oh yeah? Well, how do you know, when a Radiant shows up at your holiday party, that he'll be well-dressed?
Umm... no idea.
Because he's in-vest-ed.
What happens if a Parshendi attunes Barry White?
*laughs* I think that if they attune Barry White they immediately enter mateform.
I've heard this theory passed around, and I just want to see if you'll confirm it or not. Are you actually a bunch of tiny writers in a coat, or--
No, no, no, I'm a bunch of robots programmed to create books. The "tiny writers" one is completely false.
If you needed to pick a band to write your soundtrack, which band would it be?
Band to write my soundtrack? Probably, Two Steps From Hell.